People often say “focus on what you can control” as if it’s that’s simple and isolating variables in life is as easy as it is on a problem sheet. There are so many things behind the phrase "let it go." History, attachment, hope, ego, fear, unprocessed conversations, futures that only existed in your head. Life isn’t a well posed problem. It’s chaos, entropy, with boundary conditions you didn’t choose. You can’t always cleanly separate the controllable from the uncontrollable when the thing you want sits right at that boundary. It is true that you can control the effort. But the gap between effort and outcome… that’s where frustration lives. And I wish I had something more reassuring to say about that.
Mental Health
On Gaining Perspective
Last year, I was rejected from Oxford. No interview, just a flat-out rejection for Maths. In hindsight, that became one of the biggest turning points in my life and gave me something much more valuable than I expected: perspective. You don't always get what you want. Sometimes, you don't even get what you might deserve. … Continue reading On Gaining Perspective
Exams, Burnout, and Finding Balance
You can love a subject deeply and still feel like exams are destroying you. You can work hard, care a lot, and still walk out of an exam room feeling like you’ve failed. With A-Level Results Day just around the corner, I’ve been thinking a lot about how the pressure, the grades, and the system … Continue reading Exams, Burnout, and Finding Balance
Maths Rant 